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| Ben |
“Sounds good”, Ben replied, “maybe throw in some lunch somewhere.”
I noticed I was feeling stressed. Being best man can be hard work sometimes. My best friend Mikey was getting married this weekend and I really wanted everything to be just right for him. When Ben spoke up, it was like he could read my mind.
“Don’t worry, we’ll have plenty of time”, he said.
Mikey and I had met about five years ago, both taking MMA lessons. Mikey had already had experience as a college wrestler and it had showed. I wasn’t too bad myself, even though I had quit a few years ago and had started teaching self-defense classes. Mikey quit not much later, becoming preoccupied with his relationship with Demi. Mikey and I however would continue to hang out, our friendship growing stronger. Now that we were both in our early 30s, I was honored to be the best man at his wedding.
At the Minneapolis-Saint Paul Airport, Ben and I found our way to the arrivals hall.
“So, do you remember this guy’s name?”, I asked Ben, “maybe we should have a sign or something.”
“Jeff.”
“Last name?”
“Uhmm. Forgot.”
Ben took out his phone.
“Surely he’ll be Facebook friends with Mikey.”
Mikey was picking up the marriage license this morning and asked me to take care of picking up this Jeff for him. And of course I said yes. Yet I was so happy Ben had offered to come with me to the airport. The task of being best man had been pretty easy going so far, but in the actual weekend, there was a lot to do and remember.
Ben had been a good friend of Mikey’s for a few years as well. Ben came to work at Mikey’s office not too long ago, they are both landscape architects. He’s younger than both me and Mikey, somewhere in his mid-20s. Nevertheless he’s a reasonably mature guy and very easy to get along with. It’s happened quite frequently that the three of us go out for drinks together. Ben is quite attractive to me, but he’s definitely straight. With his charming smile and the dimples in his cheeks, he gets female attention whenever we’re at the bar. He’s taken a few girls home as well. Both guys are aware that I’m gay, but it’s something that rarely comes up in our conversations.
“Jeff Parker.”
Ben showed me his phone. I instinctively cleared my throat as I felt my heart speed up. The photo showed a man with light brown hair, a beard, blue eyes, and a friendly smile. All of a sudden I felt warm.
“We’ll be able to pick him out of the crowd, right? Quite a distinctive beard, if he still has it.”
I only heard half of what Ben was saying.
Today I was picking up the last groomsman who was arriving from Miami. He was Mikey’s college buddy who was also on the wrestling team, some guy named Jeff. I had never heard about him before the run-up to the wedding. I had been busy making sure his measurements would get to the tailor on time and things like that. I hadn’t realized he would be sexy as hell.
“Dude!”
“What?”, I asked, Ben’s exclamation snapping me out of it.
“Are you into him?”
“What? No!”
“You’re turning all red and sweaty!”
“That’s not… you’re… like… let’s just not mention it.”
Ben laughed.
“No, seriously. This weekend is not about me.”
“No problem, man. Not a peep from me.”
I saw him immediately. He still had the beard. At about 6’3’’, he was tall and hard to miss. A black T-shirt fit snugly around his broad shoulders, pumped up pecs and muscular arms. He must have easily been over 200 pounds of solid muscle. His grey sweatpants were loose and didn’t reveal much, but my eyes were immediately drawn to his crotch. I did spot something moving around but it was hard to tell. He was rolling his suitcase behind him and looked around, clearly unsure of where he was supposed to go. He and I did exchange numbers, so I wasn’t surprised to see him whip his phone out of his pocket.
“That’s him, I think”, Ben said, showing me the phone again.
I felt him looking at me.
“Close your mouth. You’re drooling.”
I realized my mouth was indeed open. I closed it.
“Jeff! Over here!”, Ben raised his voice and waved.
Jeff smiled, put his hand up and walked towards us. My heart was beating faster the closer he got to us. His smile was on another level.
I noticed I was feeling stressed. Being best man can be hard work sometimes. My best friend Mikey was getting married this weekend and I really wanted everything to be just right for him. When Ben spoke up, it was like he could read my mind.
“Don’t worry, we’ll have plenty of time”, he said.
Mikey and I had met about five years ago, both taking MMA lessons. Mikey had already had experience as a college wrestler and it had showed. I wasn’t too bad myself, even though I had quit a few years ago and had started teaching self-defense classes. Mikey quit not much later, becoming preoccupied with his relationship with Demi. Mikey and I however would continue to hang out, our friendship growing stronger. Now that we were both in our early 30s, I was honored to be the best man at his wedding.
At the Minneapolis-Saint Paul Airport, Ben and I found our way to the arrivals hall.
“So, do you remember this guy’s name?”, I asked Ben, “maybe we should have a sign or something.”
“Jeff.”
“Last name?”
“Uhmm. Forgot.”
Ben took out his phone.
“Surely he’ll be Facebook friends with Mikey.”
Mikey was picking up the marriage license this morning and asked me to take care of picking up this Jeff for him. And of course I said yes. Yet I was so happy Ben had offered to come with me to the airport. The task of being best man had been pretty easy going so far, but in the actual weekend, there was a lot to do and remember.
Ben had been a good friend of Mikey’s for a few years as well. Ben came to work at Mikey’s office not too long ago, they are both landscape architects. He’s younger than both me and Mikey, somewhere in his mid-20s. Nevertheless he’s a reasonably mature guy and very easy to get along with. It’s happened quite frequently that the three of us go out for drinks together. Ben is quite attractive to me, but he’s definitely straight. With his charming smile and the dimples in his cheeks, he gets female attention whenever we’re at the bar. He’s taken a few girls home as well. Both guys are aware that I’m gay, but it’s something that rarely comes up in our conversations.
“Jeff Parker.”
Ben showed me his phone. I instinctively cleared my throat as I felt my heart speed up. The photo showed a man with light brown hair, a beard, blue eyes, and a friendly smile. All of a sudden I felt warm.
“We’ll be able to pick him out of the crowd, right? Quite a distinctive beard, if he still has it.”
I only heard half of what Ben was saying.
Today I was picking up the last groomsman who was arriving from Miami. He was Mikey’s college buddy who was also on the wrestling team, some guy named Jeff. I had never heard about him before the run-up to the wedding. I had been busy making sure his measurements would get to the tailor on time and things like that. I hadn’t realized he would be sexy as hell.
 |
| Jeff |
“What?”, I asked, Ben’s exclamation snapping me out of it.
“Are you into him?”
“What? No!”
“You’re turning all red and sweaty!”
“That’s not… you’re… like… let’s just not mention it.”
Ben laughed.
“No, seriously. This weekend is not about me.”
“No problem, man. Not a peep from me.”
I saw him immediately. He still had the beard. At about 6’3’’, he was tall and hard to miss. A black T-shirt fit snugly around his broad shoulders, pumped up pecs and muscular arms. He must have easily been over 200 pounds of solid muscle. His grey sweatpants were loose and didn’t reveal much, but my eyes were immediately drawn to his crotch. I did spot something moving around but it was hard to tell. He was rolling his suitcase behind him and looked around, clearly unsure of where he was supposed to go. He and I did exchange numbers, so I wasn’t surprised to see him whip his phone out of his pocket.
“That’s him, I think”, Ben said, showing me the phone again.
I felt him looking at me.
“Close your mouth. You’re drooling.”
I realized my mouth was indeed open. I closed it.
“Jeff! Over here!”, Ben raised his voice and waved.
Jeff smiled, put his hand up and walked towards us. My heart was beating faster the closer he got to us. His smile was on another level.
He shook Ben’s hand, as Ben introduced himself, before turning to me.
 |
| Amir |
“Yep… that’s me!”
“Nice to meet you too.”
When we walked out of the airport back to the car, I realized I was sweating. I walked in front of the other guys as Ben asked questions about how Jeff knew Mikey. I could hear Jeff talking about being on the wrestling team with Mikey and how Mikey usually lost to him. He also mentioned he hosts Mikey and Demi at his place in Miami for a week each winter. I recalled being jealous when Mikey said he was going to Florida several times, only now realizing he went once a year. I got even more jealous knowing he was visiting this guy each time.
In the car, Ben kindly gave up the passenger seat to Jeff, who was easily the tallest.
“You need the leg room, man”, he said.
“Thanks!”
Knowing I’d have Jeff sitting next to me as I drove back up to Saint Cloud, which would take about 90 minutes, was making me both nervous and excited.
I drove the car back onto the I-494.
“So… d-did you ever visit Mikey up here?”, I asked Jeff, hating that I stuttered.
“I did, a few times. But usually he makes his way down to me to avoid the winters.”
“That makes sense”, I answered.
“Summer is looking quite good here though.”
“Humid AF, but definitely doable”, I heard Ben say from the backseat.
With a 73 high (23 Celsius) today was fine, but there would likely be rain later today.
“It’s no Miami”, I said.
I glanced over to Jeff quickly while driving. He was looking out to the road. I looked down and quickly spotted his bulge and his noticeably muscular forearm before I looked back in front of me. There was a sexual energy exuding from this guy, and it was hard to fathom not everyone was affected by it. Looking in my rearview mirror, I saw Ben doing something on his phone. Clearly, it was just me. Or maybe just everyone attracted to men.
“Are you married, Jeff?”
“No. I had a girlfriend earlier this year but she broke up with me. Said I didn’t give her enough attention.”
I smiled.
“Do you have a girlfriend?”, he asked me.
I somehow wasn’t prepared for this question.
“N-no…”, I started when I heard him gasp.
“Wait, you’re the gay one!”
I chuckled nervously. I saw Ben look up from his phone, smiling, but he didn’t say anything.
“Yeah, I am.”
“Don’t worry, I have no problem with that.”
I could tell Ben was biting his lip to keep from laughing.
“OK, that’s… great.”
Jeff was definitely straight.
The I-494 turned into the I-94 when Jeff addressed an issue.
“So, this kilt thing… is it a joke?”
I chuckled.
“Nope, actually real.”
“So, even though Mikey’s Italian, we all have to wear one?”
“Demi has Scottish heritage”, I said.
“She’s definitely doing it just to fuck with us though”, Ben piped up.
Jeff and I laughed.
“That does sound like her”, Jeff said.
“Yeah, both her and Mikey thought it was a hilarious idea, more than a tribute to her ancestors.”
“Have you guys ever worn one?”
“Nope.”
“Well, we soon will.”
When I took the exit to state highway 15, it started to rain.
“Oh boy”, Ben said.
“Saturday is an outdoor wedding”, I said.
“Oops”, Jeff replied.
We passed the ‘Welcome to Saint Cloud’ sign.
“Ah, we’re here”, Jeff said.
The 15 rolled into Saint Cloud, when I took a left onto Division Street and we were already at the shopping center where the tailor was at.
“Ooh, Panda Express?”, Ben suggested as we passed the restaurant to our right.
I noticed it was already 1.15 PM.
We had something to eat at Panda Express before we went over to the tailor’s. It was one thing to have Jeff sitting next to me while I drove. But seeing him across from me while eating, with eye contact more than a possibility, I realized just how awkward I become around attractive men. I sent Mikey a message, so he could meet us at the tailor’s.
The tailor was on the same lot, so we walked across to enter the shop.
“Hi! We’re here to try on the suits under the name of Mikey Cosentino”, I said.
“Very good”, the man behind the counter said, “follow me.”
Ben, Jeff and I followed the man to the back where there was a fitting area. He rolled out a rack with four suits, all four having kilts on the bottom. Each suit showed a name, even though it was clear that the one with the grey jacket belonged to Mikey; the other three had black jackets. The three of us went into a fitting room. The clerk, Mark, late forties, most likely gay, helped us with putting on every part of the outfit. When we came out of the fitting rooms, we all laughed nervously. It felt sort of weird to wear a kilt, and it was also quite weird to see the other guys wear one. But I got used to it quite quickly. Mark looked us all up and down, and checked if all the kilts stopped exactly at our knees, which was regulation.
“Is it me or am I absolutely rocking this look?”, Ben asked.
“I think we all are”, Jeff said.
We looked in the mirror and each other for a while.
“You’re not supposed to wear anything under it, right?”, Jeff said.
“You’re not?”, I asked.
“No, I don’t think so”, Ben replied.
“They say a true Scotsman doesn’t wear anything underneath…”, Mark the clerk started when he stopped.
I saw Jeff reach under his kilt as he wiggled down his underwear and kicked them off. On the floor I saw a black pair of UnderArmour boxer briefs. Ben and I laughed and took off our own underwear as well. Even Mark laughed.
At that moment, Mikey walked in. We all cheered and walked over to hug him. The freedom of movement in my legs, and well, other parts felt quite amazing. I should wear a kilt more often. Jeff and Mikey had an especially long hug, as they hadn’t seen each other for a few months. It was
 |
| Mikey |
Afterwards, when everyone was in their regular clothes and holding a hanger with their outfit for Saturday, I drove Jeff to the hotel, the 912 Regency Plaza. This is where he would be staying and also where the wedding would be. Mikey and Ben went back to Mikey’s place where we would join them soon.
“Thanks for driving me”, he said, “better to check in now and drop my case before festivities start.”
I smiled.
I waited in the lobby as Jeff quickly went up to his room and changed. He came down wearing blue jeans and a grey plaid short-sleeve button-down, nicely tucked in. He looked a bit like a lumberjack, in the hottest way possible.
“Let’s get the party started”, he said.
I drove him back to Mikey and Demi’s house. Ben and Mikey had just returned with supplies for the evening. We hung out, drank some beers, and had a lot of fun. At one point we fired up the barbecue and started grilling. The sun had come out again, and it was just a great day.
At one point I was in the kitchen to refill my drink when Jeff also walked in.
“Hey man”, he said.
I could tell he was a little tipsy.
“Are you also moving on to something stronger?”, he asked when he saw my drink.
“No, it’s actually just Coke. I’m driving you back tonight, remember?”
“Oh. Right”, he said as he poured vodka into his glass.
When I handed him the bottle of Coke, he said, “So, Mikey says you met at MMA?”
“Yeah, I did MMA for like 4 years”, I said.
“Wow, that’s pretty hardcore for a…”, he started when he looked up at me and we had eye contact.
“That’s pretty hardcore”, he finished, putting the bottle back.
“Aren’t you also into martial arts?”, I asked.
“Yeah, I got into it straight after college. And still going strong”, he said.
“Cool!”, I said, admiring his body as he walked back outside in front of me. His butt was a work of art when he walked.
“So now that you quit, are you doing anything else?”, he then asked.
“I give self-defense classes”, I said, “so I’m still using some of my background.”
Jeff laughed.
“Better hope none of these attackers are MMA-trained”, he said, mocking my job.
“Well, actually, the techniques I teach are quite effective”, I said.
“Seriously”, he answered, “if you can overpower me, you can fuck me in the ass.”
We just entered the backyard, so Ben and Mikey heard and laughed.
“I am totally taking you two to the boxing gym tomorrow”, Ben said.
We all laughed.
“Yes, please join me at the gym tomorrow morning and on Saturday”, Mikey said, “I’ll need it to get out of my system early.”
We agreed to meet at the gym the next morning.
Demi came home from a day of massages, waxing, facials, mani- and pedicure and dinner with some girlfriends. She hugged all of us and asked if we had enjoyed trying on our kilts, with a glint in her eye. We all chuckled.
“You’ll have to wait and see what it looks like”, Mikey said as she sat in his lap and they kissed.
It was confirmed that Demi had asked to have the male part of the wedding party in kilts because she thought it would be fun, but she also thought it would be kind of sexy.
There was still more partying to be done, it was only Thursday night. So I drove Ben and Jeff home before it got too late. Ben was just feeling a little happier than usual, whereas Jeff was now actually drunk. He fell asleep in the passenger seat as I first dropped off Ben.
“Now if you touch him when he’s sleeping, it’s still rape”, Ben quipped from the backseat.
“Fuck off”, I said, laughing.
“No seriously, I can imagine the insensitivity is quite the turn-off. All the gay jokes and stuff.”
“It’s not the best”, I admitted, “but I know he means well.”
“Yeah, he’s probably not used to being around a gay guy. Good on you for giving him the benefit of the doubt. But you better kick his ass tomorrow if that fight is actually happening”, he said just as we arrived at his building.
“Oh hey, thanks for the lift”, Ben said as he winked in the rear-view mirror before getting out.
With a sleeping Jeff beside me, I drove back to the hotel. I heard slight snores over the sound of the engine. When I parked, I had to shake his shoulder to wake him up.
“Hey, sleepy! We’re here!”
“What? Oh. OK.”
“Do you remember your room number?”
“Uh. Yeah.”
“OK, good night!”
Jeff slowly opened the car door and walked into the hotel.
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